CALEB JENKINS: THE DEFINITION OF MK (MISSIONARY KID) RESILIENCY

Caleb, Ethan, Ruth, and Dave in early Uganda days

Just say for a moment that you wanted to assure that your child would always be a social misfit, academic failure, and spiritual basket case.   What would you do?

                How about if you chose to move far from family and friends to Uganda as she recovered from economic, political, and military chaos before the child was born?   What if you thought you heard God’s voice say, “Go and trust me?”

                How about if the child was born during a crisis?    Church conflict abounded and financial backing was rapidly declining.   A few weeks after his birth your family “hit the road,” lived out of a suitcase, and sought new partners.

Caleb's T-Ball team with Kampala Kid's League

                How about if after 11 years in Uganda you finally get a chance to climb the career ladder?   Instead you hear God’s voice whisper, “Go to Rwanda.”

                When you get to Rwanda you can’t find a workable school option.   Why not pack up, write a Rwanda hating blog, and call it quits?   Instead, you do the unthinkable and start an international school.

Caleb and Nathaniel Shelburne at Kenya MK Camp

                Those entrepreneurial endeavors can be nightmares.   You need entrepreneurial partners.   Yet, the successful entrepreneurs have similar psychological profiles as white color criminals.    Starting both a non-denominational church and international school in post-genocide Rwanda guaranteed strange mutating conflict.    Make a child observe and deal with that in his early teen years is a recipe for a true nut case.

                Lastly, if nothing else has broken your child – If Africa is home why not believe, God whispered again, “Leave home.   Go to a land I will show you.    Your scattered people need the skills, network, and experience I’ve given you.”   Do the unthinkable.   Uproot your child from his African home during his senior year of high school.   Force him to leave his best friends and all that he knows and understands.   Incorporate him into a foreign nation at the most cut throat season of life.  That will surely break him.

                Yet, there is just a little matter bigger than these flamboyant missionary endeavors - The Sovereign Providential Grace of the Creator of the Universe, I AM God.  He does the amazing when we act in faith.

                He builds resilience.   The dictionary defines resilience as, “Able to recover quickly from misfortune; able to return to original form after being bent, compressed, or stretched out of shape. A human ability to recover quickly from disruptive change, or misfortune without being overwhelmed or acting in dysfunctional or harmful ways.”  (http://www.resiliencycenter.com/definitions.shtml.) 

  

How did we ever get this photo of Caleb?

              Our son, Caleb Jenkins has been a definition of resilience this year.  We are immensely thankful.

                A little less than 1 year ago, we sold all of our possessions except a few memories, left our earthly home, and moved to Chicago believing in a call to grow the ROC network and serve our people, the Diaspora of Africa’s Great Lakes.   

                Caleb explored and adapted.    He chose to not retreat into the world of internet home schooling.   He chose not to attempt public high school.   He chose to do the humbling.   Caleb is exceptionally intelligent.   He took on the stigma of taking a General Equivalency Degree (GED) test.   He enrolled at a local junior community college, the College of DuPage (COD).    He faced life head on.

With Gabrielle Pribukick, and Krista Deddo at COD Band Concert

                He started off biking 2 miles each day to school.    

                His GED qualified him for student aid, and his college bills were paid.   (We also bounced lots of offices together.   For more reading see http://www.jenkinsinrwanda.blogspot.com/2012/09/office-bouncing-in-usa.html.) 

                He took his trombone skills and joined the COD band.    He sharpened his skills.

         

Caleb with COD Cru

       He embraced his faith.   He found “The Cru” (Campus Crusade.)   He got involved.  He made new friends.   He began to lead.

                From The Cru he found a new church plant just getting started called, “The Branch.”    He embraced our church planting heritage and joined the spiritual entrepreneurs.

                Our missionary family funding has been in decline.   Caleb found a part-time job tutoring younger students.    He is paying his bills.

                Caleb’s grandparents, Gaston and Jan Tarbet reached retirement and no longer needed two cars.   They gave a car to Caleb.   He learned to drive, and smoked his tests on the first try.   He now chauffeurs family and friends around busy Chicago.

Caleb and Jonah Wright at the Harambee

                He saw what he wanted and took a risk.   He only completed the application for the one university he hoped to attend.   Like his sister, Sophia he chose prestigious Wheaton College.  He applied and was given early admission.   He has chased every scholarship that can be found.   Of the anticipated $42,000 that Caleb needs to pay for his freshman year at Wheaton College he only lacked $5,600.

                We followed our African tradition and threw a Harambee Party on Sunday, May 19 http://hekimagreatlakesmessenger.blogspot.com/2013/05/frequently-asked-questions-faq-about.html.)    We feel like we know so few people in Chicago, but 82.75 people attended.  (To see photos of the Harambee check out https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10151365289741364.1073741832.650346363&type=3.) 

(For more reading on Harambee see

The Lord worked through our community’s faith to discover another $1,000.  (If you would like to contribute to the Harambee send a check to Caleb Jenkins, 108 Kellogg Place, Wheaton, IL, 60187.)

                So now just for a moment say you want to assure that your child will be socially adaptable, an academic success, and a spiritual entrepreneur?   

                We recommend you trust the Lord’s promptings, take risks of faith, nurture all you

Cheering with the Simba Kampala Kid's League team

can through those transitions, and then let the Lord do the surprising.

                When the history of Africa’s Great Lake’s Missionary Kids are written we believe there will be a footnote that says, “Definition of MK (Missionary Kid) Resilience – AKA Caleb Jenkins academic year 2012-2013."

                Yebaleko ssebo.   (Well done, sir.)

OFFICE BOUNCING IN THE USA

A little known missionary fact – Office Bouncing is as much a part of the missionary game as dribbling is part of basketball and soccer.

                Many missionary supporters don’t know about Office Bouncing.

                Many missionaries despise Office Bouncing.

                Some of my better Banyarwanda (Rwandan) friends have whispered that many contemporary missionaries are neither relevant nor influential.   However, if you watch the missionaries whom nationals admire you will notice they are masters at office bouncing.

                A quick Google search of “Definition of Office Bouncing” did not get a single relevant hit.   Let me tell the secret.   In my early days in Uganda I followed two Office Bouncing masters.

                The first was Peter Ngobi.    Peter was the real estate agent who helped us find our first home.   He also kept us safe by letting us know rumors of possible civil strife.     Peter “bounced.”   His family was well connected, but did not land well in the dispersion of inheritances.    He seemed to know everyone.   Without earthly inheritance Peter masterfully used human capital.    His savvy with knowing property owners and potential renters was invaluable.   He moved around making friends and putting friends together.    Peter did with shoe leather what twitter and face book attempt with wifi.

Master Office Bouncer, Gaston Tarbet with wife, Janet

                The second was Gaston Tarbet, Jana’s dad.    During a missionary’s first days in a new nation the first tasks are government documentation.    Many missionaries dodge the office bounce.   Gaston embraced it.    You dress well.   You print business cards.   You write a letter of explanation.   You go and visit government bureaucrats for the first time.    You wait patiently for your turn.   While waiting you read and pray.    When you meet them you treat them with respect.   You never forget to pastor first.   You try to learn a few details about their lives.   After your meeting you pray and bless them.

                Office Bouncing is the act of moving from office to office like a ball bounces with the purpose of making an enduring friendship for an eternal purpose.   Some think it is about ticking off items on a TO DO List.   The TO DO list will be finished at the appropriate time, but Office Bouncing is kingdom work at God’s pace.

                Many missionaries complain about Office Bouncing.   They see it as a waste of time when they “have to preach the gospel.”    Many supporters don’t get the first months and years of adjustment either.   If both are patient they’ll see profound relevance and influence.   Good Office Bouncers register churches and organizations, get visas, keep documents relevant, pay taxes, listen well, and nurture a community’s hopes.   They are the point guards of missionary organizations.

                A few have inquired about what our first months in Chicago (Cyikago for us Bantu speakers) is like.  It is Office Bouncing.

Caleb with Sophia and Ethan at Third Culture Kids (TCK) Camp

                Allow me to tell the story of enrolling our oldest son, Caleb in school.

  

Caleb with friends at KICS 2012 Prom

1.  This was to be Caleb’s senior year in high school.   However, he had the misfortune of landing in a new location in the USA during his senior year.   After some inquiries it seemed the best option was for Caleb to take courses at a local community college (College of DuPage / COD) in lieu of his senior year to prepare to enter a top Christian liberal arts college in the following year. 
2.     Caleb visited a friend over the summer.    In the process of travel he lost his passport.   We assumed he would not need his passport until his next opportunity to travel outside of the United States.
3.    Our family acclimated to life in Wheaton, Illinois by joining the Wheaton Library and Park Association.   In the process Caleb received a Park’s Card.
4. All of our family had physicals and updated immunizations as we returned to the USA.   The kids all needed these to be accepted into educational institutions.
5.   Caleb applied to the College of DuPage / COD and was accepted though he did not have a high school diploma.   We understood he could be accepted as a dual credit student and take credit to both finish high school and receive university credit.
6.      Caleb and I applied for financial aid (FASFA).   As we finished the application we received information that led us to believe that Caleb would receive a Pell Grant and Student Loan to pay for expenses at the COD.  
7.  Caleb and I went to the Financial Aid office at COD.
8. The financial aid office informed us that in order to get financial aid Caleb must have either a High School diploma or a General Equivalency Diploma (GED.)
9.  Caleb and I went to the COD GED office.  (Note in Office Bouncing that eventually it develops its own localized vernacular consisting of acronyms.   The best Office Bouncers are acronym linguistic masters.)
10.    The August GED registration was full.   We inquired about the on-line GED versions we’d seen frequently and were told they were not acceptable to COD.
11. We attempted to register Caleb for the next COD GED in September, but in order to register needed a government issued photo ID.
12.   The COD GED office would not take Caleb’s Wheaton Park’s ID as photo ID. 
13.   Caleb got a COD student photo ID.   The COD GED office would not accept Caleb’s COD student ID as a government issued photo ID.
14.   Jana then joined the journey as we went to Wheaton’s Post Office (PO) to apply for a replacement passport.   We thought this was just a nudge from God to get a passport and be ready for travel.
15.  When we got to Wheaton’s PO they would not take a USA passport application without a photo id of Caleb.   The Wheaton PO would not accept Caleb’s Wheaton Park, nor COD ID as a valid photo government issued ID.   They sent us to the Wheaton Illinois Office of the Secretary of State (IOOTSOS) to get an Illinois State ID (ISID).
16. At the Wheaton Illinois OOTOS we were told that in order to get Caleb an Illinois State ID Jana or I must sign an affidavit affirming that we were Caleb’s parents.   The affidavit required for us to have Illinois State Driver’s Licenses.
17.    We decided since we were at the right office we may be well served to apply for an Illinois State Driver’s License.   As we attempted to fill out the application we were told we needed our USA Social Security Card.    Jana and I knew our Social Security (SS) numbers and filed taxes, etc… but we could not remember having our SS cards in years.
18.  We went back home and looked through our documents for our SS cards, but had no luck.   They must have been lost (most likely for me in the fall of 1985 as I was washing clothes as a freshman at Harding University - HU.)
19.    Jana and I found the on line application for SS Cards and filled out the application.   The application asked for our parent’s (Gaston and Jan Tarbet – AKA GJT; and Lloyd and Lois Jenkins – AKA LLJ) SS numbers.  We called GJT and LLJ to get their numbers.   After getting the numbers we burned the piece of paper it was written upon.   (Just kidding, but DJ’s “little brother”, Tim (TJ) is a US Marine (USMC), we’ve lived in Africa for some time, and we will really make life miserable if we catch an identity thief.)
20.    DJ and JJ went to the SS office and applied for new SS cards.
21.    While at the Illinois Office of the Secretary of State (IOOTSOS) they mentioned if Caleb had 2 pieces of “official mail” plus his SS card he could apply for an Illinois State ID (ISID).  “Personal mail” would not count.  
22. Caleb had “Official mail” from COD, but not another piece of mail.   Caleb also still had his original SS card.  We called John Osborne (JO), Rwanda Outreach Community (ROC) Partners Chairman and Oklahoma Christian University (OC) Director of International Studies to request for OC to send Caleb “Official Mail.”   (We also contacted other universities and the ACT office to see who could get Caleb “Official Mail” to our home the fastest.)
23. A few days later we had “Official Mail” and went back to the IOOTSOS to get Caleb an ISID.
24.  With an ISID we went to the COD GED office and registered Caleb to take the GED.
25.   Last week, Caleb took the GED.

Currently, our unfinished Office Bouncing TO DO List includes:

1. Receive Caleb’s GED scores.   (We’re confident he smoked it.   Remember this is the kid who read encyclopedias and then asked his parents questions to test our intelligence.)
2.  Correct Caleb’s FASFA with a GED.
3. Discuss with COD’s Financial Aid Office how to get the Pell Grant and Student Loan.
4.  Apply for Illinois State Driver’s License.

Yet, Office Bouncing with Masters has taught us that our TO DO List is still filled with many unknowns.   Thus we should expect to bounce just a little more than we anticipate.

The Jenkins' boys with Gabriel Mugisha Jacobs

What have we learned?

1. Office Bouncing is part of life.   Everyone does it.   Every nation and culture requires it.   Anthropologists call these, “Rites of Passage.”   We must go through trials to become mature in a community.
2.   Office Bouncing is Biblical.   Luke by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit in writing Acts seemed to take special care to let Theophilus know that those following Jesus as the Living Lord did all they could to honor Roman government process.   Paul likely had Office Bouncing on his mind when the Holy Spirit led him to write Romans 13:1-7 and 1 Timothy 2:1-8.
3. Office Bouncing is most pronounced when one is in transition.    If one lives in the same location these tasks have a rhythm and order.   As one starts afresh they feel like drinking water from an open fire hydrant.
4.   Office Bouncing creates opportunities for Gospel proclamation.   One of the fruits of 19 years is the number of people we met Office Bouncing who shared our journey of following Jesus.
5.    If Office Bouncing never produces satisfying ticks on a TO DO List it does shape our character.   For this we are thankful.
6.       May God bless all of our supporters in North America who Office Bounce.
7. May God bless all of our missionary sojourners, both Bazungu (White) and Bafrica (Black) who Office Bounce.

Enjoy your Office Bouncing Journey,

Dave